Jesus Saves

One afternoon while I was in Chattanooga last summer, I was contentedly taking a hike with my dog, minding my own business. I got back to my car that was parked on the side of the road at the trail head. Parked behind me was some guy. As I got to my car, he approached me.
"I just wanted to give you this," this complete stranger says to me.
He handed me a Bible.
I gave him a funny look and tried to give it back. I'm sure I could find a Bible at my house. He gave it back.
"I saw your bumper stickers and I used to think a lot like you do. Before I was saved."
A brief synopsis of the ideals I have on the back bumper of my car consists of messages of Peace, Coexist (i.e. multiple religeons can coexist peacefully), a Presidential campaign sticker promoting a Stewart/Colbert ticket for the 2008 elections, and namaste (the light in me honors the light in you - i.e. respect people and their differences). On a side note, while I am aware of the slighly hippie tendencies of my bumper stickers, they at least force me to be a nicer driver - because, really , with those messages on the ass of your car, you can't really be an asshole driving. I hate hypocrites. But when he commented on my stickers, I couldn't even respond for a minute because I couldn't wrap my head around the concept of my non-hateful, pro-lovin' bumper stickers being against anything specifically Christian. That was a frightening thought. So, before driving off, I stopped and asked him, "Why?" Because I could not pass up the opportunity to fight it out with one of these condescending Christian evangelists that give Christianity a bad name.
The explanation that ensued was mind boggling. It reaffirmed the fact that you really cannot argue with stupid people. I am so disappointed that I couldn't argue with him rationally about it. The general message I left with from him was that people are born with evil in them. People are inherently bad. Jesus must save them from that evil. Eastern religions, on the other hand, are based on the idea of the goodness of the person, which is clearly a terrible thing. I don't claim to be immaculately perfect or pure or anything, but I also can't bring myself to believe that people are evil. I couldn't even comprehend the metaphors he was using because they simply didn't make sense. I was astounded. Offended, bemused, and shocked. And above all, unconvinced and repulsed.

More Conversation Blogging

Do you ever have those conversations where you get really, really worked up and passionate? You and the imaginary offender are having it out and you're probably winning, but you get so worked up you are in tears by the end?...Yeah, me neither.
My favorite, however, are the arguments you start in your head with complete strangers that you judge to be horrible people because, seriously, who needs to drive a bright yellow, take-up-the-entire-URBAN-road Hummer?
Me- Come on, you haven't even ever been off-roading in that thing have you?
Hummer Driver- This is America! If I can afford it, it's none of your business what I drive!
Me- It is my business if I'm doing what I can to not destroy the environment so badly that my future grandchildren have to live in space while you are polluting the earth pretty much single handedly AND taking up all of the space on the road!
Hummer driver- I don't have to listen to you and your stupid hippie conspiracy theories!
....

Ill At Ease with My Lack of Concern

I'm having one of those days, weeks - maybe even lives - where I feel like I am out of the loop. I feel like the world has failed to let me in on some very important facts. I tend to lean towards the side of oblivious despite my distinct and strenuous efforts to figure out what is going on. Lately this may have something to do with the fact that I'm about to go into my senior year as an art and journalism major in an economy that is sucking with two interests that will make certain the fact that I will be poor for the rest of my life. It's also not really the time to go into journalism, as newspapers are struggling to find a way to survive in the internet era. Anyway, I'm not that worried about it, which worries me, because it gives me that feeling like I'm missing something. I guess I just figure that I'll find a way to do what I want eventually.

Extending a Thanks to QUOOP

My most recent endeavor has been to start swimming again. I swam for something like 8 years of my life and have to admit that I really do miss it sometimes. So, I went down to the Queens pool. For those who haven't had the privilege of swimming here, let me explain this wonderland. I'm fairly certain that by taking just one breath while in the room, one ingests 100,000,000 fungal spores that spawn and latch on to you lungs to incubate for the next 20 years there. The growths on the walls and ceiling are impressive, but are nothing compared to those around the bottom of the pool near the filter at the bottom. The last time I was there, it was raining. Inside. I actually love it when that happens, though, there's a very derelict quality about our poor under-loved pool that I find very appealing in an indie film kind of way.
There's also a plaque on the wall near the door noting that QUOOP is responsible for getting a pool at Queens. QUOOP is the Queens University Order of the Pool, I think, but more importantly, is the best acronym ever.

Promoting Pointlessness

We all have causes. I'm all for that. But my new cause is causless-ness. Here are my thoughts on the matter:
-There are too many causes
-I'm tired of hearing about it
-People with causes are snobby and condescending
-I don't care how good the cause is
-Actions speak louder than words
-Causes attract attention-getting do-gooders, it gets a bit narcissistic.
-If someone wants to buy a $500 dollar pair of shoes, they probably won't listen to a snobby cause-preaching person yell at them about their ignorance because, frankly, they think they're too fabulous for you
-Yes, people like that do suck

So, my new cause is the promotion of pointless, causeless absurdity. Because, honestly, we could all do without the seriousness sometimes.

Cassette Tapes

Remember the days before CDs, where cassette tapes dominated the musical world? You could fast forward or back to exactly the spot in the song that you wanted. This really only worked when it was only a few seconds away from the thing you were looking for. If you were looking for the start to another song, though, you end up alternating between the fast forward and back buttons for a good 5 minutes before locating the song (much less the beginning of it) that you're looking for. But my favorite part of having tapes was the sound that they made when you took them out or put them back into their little designated cases. It was such a crisp sound and feel when you opened those clear plastic doors and, with a slight rattling sound of the tape reel and the hinges of the case, you slip the tape into its little slot.

How Dare!

I came across this thing called the world wide web recently. I've been told it's also referred to as the Internet. Well, it was sent from Satan to destroy the world! Let me educate you on the evil of its ways. It destroys jobs because who is going to go out to buy things at a register from a person when they can have it delivered to them at their home? It promotes hatred because there are websites for hate groups. It allows for capitalism to prevail, advertising overwhelms the experience of internet use. It allows for people to publish things about eating babies! There are things that promote the eating of animals! And journalists are losing their jobs because newspapers can't compete with this Internet fad! Job losses abound and multiply as this Internet pheomenon sweeps the world. People are starving and dying while you order your new cushions for your lounge chair with the click of a mouse. Incidentally, the cushions are made by the children who aren't being eaten in sweatshops across the world. Boycott the Internet! Stop sitting on your high-horse with your cushions, snacking on turkey legs and babies like a savage sultan and spitting upon the common man, you hateful internet users!